THE TYRANNY OF BLACKBERRIES, CELLPHONES & LAPTOPS
Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005.THE TYRANNY OF BLACKBERRIES, CELLPHONES & LAPTOPS --Or, when will the God of Chaos, Calamity & Cataclysm strike again! --Everywhere you go these days, chaos reigns disguised as "state of the art wireless technology". It seems that happiness has been reduced to having a newfangled whatchamacallit that does absolutely everything but clean the kitchen sink.Speaking of scruffy sculleries, your best bet would be to a visit your local "Tabernacle of Tetrachloride" where you can request a private audience with the "Wizard of Washbasins". Failing that, consult the "Diva of Drudgery" who usually has all the quick and dirty answers to the western world's most innocuous conundrums!Sadly, my days as a professional cherry-picker in Peach Bottom, Virginia are over ...which brings me in a round about way to my favorite comfort food ..."passion fruit" and plums. Besides consuming far too many succulent seeds for my own good, I also enjoy the occasional shopping-spree for trendy "fruit of the loom" drawers in the "Big Apple". However, that doesn't leave me much spare time to pursue happiness unless you count such delightful diversions such as a fruitless game of tiddlywinks or a toe-wrestling tournament in the "Old Country".To those byte-inclined "Bluetooth" folk who can't live without their "BlackBerries", I say get a life! These gizmos do not impress me in the least.
For one thing these "robust" packages of tutti-fruit technology are worth a king's ransom. And for another, hanging them on your lapel makes you look like a dork, or worse yet a loon. More to the point, unless you enjoy low-impact digital workouts with your thumb and index finger?take my humble advice, be a dweeb and forget about them!Celluar telephones, the smallest of these dastardly digital devices, are a melodious menace to mankind. Besides making their owners look divinely self-important in a world of wannabes and winners, they also lurk surruptitiously about in the bottom of pockets, packsacks, and purses offering melodrama at its best for bystanders. And, as my dear Mum used to say, "anything that vibrates, sings, and talks back when you least expect it should be potty-trained".So, to avoid being zapped by alien airwaves, I recommend using "Semaphore".
This low-tech communication method is a lot cheaper and more fun than a bag of juicy-fruit bubble-gum. After all, how many people do you know who carry around flags all day long, flap their arms, and look a tad miffed when cab-drivers interrupt their train of thought and terse text messages?As for "laptops", they seem to languish about every prominent place under the sun. Have you ever noticed how they invite unwanted attention from sticky-fingered sorts who can't wait to abscond with them when you're responding to the call of nature? Then of course there are curmudgeons like me who think it's a waste of time to invent something that helps nincompoops organize their recipes, play solitaire, or set a trap for a wireless mouse.Being from the "old school", I was always taught that children should be seen and not heard. Now if only that credo would apply to all these modern communication tools, the world would be an infinitely quieter place.Just imagine a world without wireless windbags, wonky windows, or wicked weirdoes fingering the fruit ...where we would all be free to follow our bliss ...be it picking four-leaf clovers, drawing dorky droodles, coloring outside the lines, or maybe even tickling someone pink for a change!.
6 Tips To Help With Your Workout
In today's world of rushing to our next appointment, doing more and often times super sizing our meals, it can feel like there's no time or energy left to work out. We may at the New Year put in our resolutions what we're like to work on such as gaining a 6 pack or losing extra weight in other places. But by 2 or 3 weeks into the New Year, we may have lost the excitement and energy we once had when we were writing these goals down. But there are some easy ways to help yourself get back into keeping track of your work out. Drink Water- Do you ever feel like you'd rather just sit on the couch or lay in bed for hours after a hard day at work? Drinking more water, preferably when you're not at work to avoid every 20 or so minute bathroom trips can help you look and feel better.
Not to mention it flushes out the toxins and leaves you having more energy.A log- Keeping a log of how many squats, crunches and or pounds will help encourage yourself to move forward with your workout. You...
6 Tips To Help With Your Workout
Fruit > 6 Tips To Help With Your Workout
Modified Mediterranean Diet
The Mediterranean diet has been identified as the secret of greater life expectancy among the people of the Mediterranean region. Mediterranean cuisines are a combination of vegetables, nuts, fruit, legumes and beans cooked in olive oil, with a moderate intake of dairy products and red wine. They consume very small quantities of animal fat, meat and sugar in their diet, on a weekly or monthly basis. This nourishing balanced diet along with an active life style help prevent some of the chronic diseases of the heart, as well as cancer, diabetes and gallstones.
Researchers have identified the traditional Mediterranean as a healthy diet compared diets rich in animal fats and products.
Americans and Europeans consume poultry, eggs and red meat cooked in animal fat such as butter or margarine that are a rich source of saturated fat. The intake of such food with little or no fiber, deficient in essential vitamins, minerals and nutrition vital to the human body...
Modified Mediterranean Diet
Fruit > Modified Mediterranean Diet
Mangosteen
Mangosteen (also known as mangostin and guttiferae garcinia mangostana L) is the fruit of the mangosteen tree. The tree is quite slow in growth but can achieve heights of anything from 20 to 80 feet. It is typically thick-leaved and grows exclusively in tropical countries with climate such as in India, the East Indies, Thailand and the Philippines.
It requires a considerable amount of moisture to thrive. The leaves are of leathery texture and can grow to a length of ten inches or more.
It is believed to have originated from the Sunda Islands and is most extensively cultivated in Thailand, Kampuchea, Burma and Singapore.
There have been repeated attempts to cultivate it in places like Queensland and Africa, but these have never been very successful. The mangosteen tree was first introduced in America in 1906, when the United States Department of Agriculture received seeds from Java. Attempts to cultivate it in California, Florida and even Hawaii were...
Fruit > Mangosteen
How to Throw an Unforgettable Kids Birthday Party
Kids take their birthdays very seriously, and are extremely disappointed if their birthday parties are anything short of spectacular. Throwing an unforgettable kids birthday party can sometimes seem like a task better suited for a professional event planner.
But with the proper party supplies, a little know how and a lot of imagination, you can throw a birthday party that the kids will be talking about all year.Before you let your inner party planner take over, make sure that throughout the process you consult with the birthday boy or girl, unless of course the party is a surprise. Kids have their own ideas of what makes a party fun, and if the kids don't have a good time the party is a bust. Discuss possible theme ideas, party games, food, and favors with them to ensure everything is kid friendly.
If you are planning a surprise party you can ask siblings or friends for ideas and opinions.Theme Party IdeasA successful kids birthday party starts off with a great theme...
How to Throw an Unforgettable Kids Birthday Party
Fruit > How to Throw an Unforgettable Kids Birthday Party
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Guardian Disability Insurance Brokerage Shows Why People Want Disability Insurance in Real Time
Rockville, MD (ContentDesk) March 22, 2006 -- Individual disability insurance may be one of the most important financial products a person can own, however too many Americans don't own enough to protect their lifestyle in the event of an accident or illness.Steve Crawford, President of Guardian Disability Insurance Brokerage, has released a new tool which shows everybody why people are...
insurance Guardian Disability Insurance Brokerage Shows Why People Want Disability Insurance in Real Time THE TYRANNY OF BLACKBERRIES, CELLPHONES & LAPTOPS
Fruit > Guardian Disability Insurance Brokerage Shows Why People Want Disability Insurance in Real Time